


Do you still love me?

by kirst003



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-04-21
Packaged: 2018-10-22 01:18:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10686822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kirst003/pseuds/kirst003
Summary: Just some feelings Abby and Erin have about Erin's leaving





	1. Abby

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah I dunno, pre movie, just feelings about things I suppose. Apologies for all the mistakes there probably are. I wrote this on my phone on my lunch break.

Abby never really had a problem making friends when she was a kid. Keeping them on the other hand always proved to be more of a challenge. It wasn't that she would fight with them. But Abby moved a lot as a kid, and while the logical part of Abby's brain said it was too hard for little kids to keep in touch, part of her always wondered why she was never enough. Why it always seemed like out of sight out of mind with people. If she didn't see them regularly, or talk to them, they would suddenly forget she existed. It's probably why she was so full on with Erin at the start. 

She'd never met anyone like her, someone that could get as enthusiastic about things Abby liked, never tried to change the subject to something more "normal". If she's being honest with herself she was probably already a little in love with Erin after that first day. Being friends with Erin lulled her into a false sense of security though, yeah she might have insisted on regular weekend sleepovers, and she begged her Mom to let Erin come on their family holidays. Afraid too much time apart would change what they had. But Erin was there, always there. Sure Erin had always wanted to fit in a little more, yes she would freak out on occasion. But she never left for long. So Abby wasn't initially too concerned Erin didn't show up to their interview. A bit pissed sure. But it was Erin, her best friend, who always came back. 

It was weeks before Abby accepted she'd been left alone, again. Years before Abby let anyone get close to her again, you couldn't get hurt when people left if you weren't close to them to begin with. Holtzmann was the first to make it past Abby's walls after Erin left. She was always around. Abby didn't notice at first, but work turned into movie nights, lunches outside (still working of course) on the nice days. It was different than with Erin. She loved Holtz that was without question at this point, but she was in love with Erin, that unfortunately seemed like something that was never going to change. 

Even years later, as she sat outside eating lunch with Holtz, going over the schematics of Holtz's latest toy - trying to hopefully make it so there is no poof this time. Seeing someone who looks like Erin, she really should look into getting a spare pair of glasses for the lab, walking across campus still stirs up all the old feelings.


	2. Erin

Do you know the feeling when you know you've done something wrong, terrible even, but none of that compares to the actions you took after that point? Like what you did initially would be forgivable, but everything after that, what were you even thinking? 

Ever since Erin first saw her neighbors' ghost as a kid, all she ever wanted was to be normal. To fit in with everyone else. She tried so hard. But once she became friends with Abby that all fell away, not completely, but it was never at the front of her mind when Abby was around. How could it be? Abby made her feel like no one else had in her entire life. She made her feel like what Erin said was important, like SHE was important, like she was worthwhile. Abby was friends with Erin for who she was and for some reason wanted to actually be around her, a lot. It didn't mean that she didn't still want to be normal. Getting bullied at school about being weird has the ability of reminding her often how not normal she was. 

She remembers asking Abby once why she was even friends with Erin, why Abby didn't have other friends. Abby might have palmed it off as a joke, but she could tell that Abby was hurt by the fact none of her previous friends had ever kept in touch. It's probably why she did it to be honest. Not the running away, god no, that was all her and her fears, she's been in enough therapy to know that. But the not going back, soo many people at left Abby, Erin was supposed to be her best friend, how could she do that too? So she stayed away, didn't call, didn't write. She was too afraid to get the confirmation Abby never wanted to see her again. 

Erin had run, because she was afraid, being afraid the ghosts made her weird was not new. Her feelings for Abby, probably not new if she really thought about, but what that meant, that fear, oh boy that was very new. Years later, walking across campus, if you really want to call this place higher education, she realised the running, that was forgivable, Abby would have been mad but she would have got over it. The after, the never calling, never coming back. That was unforgivable, and she could see now it didn't even matter. Abby was happy, she could see her laughing with a weird looking blonde on the grass. How could she go over there now, Abby is happy, why would she destroy that when she's not even sure she can stay this time?


End file.
